If you spend anytime on social media you know how easy it can be to get an inaccurate view of someone’s true reality or even begin to want a life (or aspects of a life) that aren’t yours.
I must admit, I’ve seen that nasty envy manifest itself in my own life from time to time. Just as quickly as someone can change their profile picture to showcase a recent Disney trip complete with matching monogrammed Mickey shirts; or post a pic of their new and improved designer kitchen I can start to envy or want something that isn’t the Lord’s plan for me at the moment. The problem is, a profile picture is never the full story behind someone’s life. It’s just a picture and we all know you can’t see all the details in a picture.
As an illustration, when you see a picture of our romantic date night at the base of the world’s tallest building….
… you might think, “Man, our last date night was to Outback Steakhouse- boring.”
Or if you see our crew having dinner on the shores of the Mediterranean Sea….
…you may think, “All we ever do is go to Gulf Shores- lame.”
Or when you scroll through your feed and see our family posed merrily at the base of an enormous rock where the movie Martian was filmed…
…okay, that’s just cool. Regardless.
Back to my point… sure, it’s easy to think that we are jet setting around the world with our full brood of boys trying new things, making memories and getting our adventure tanks filled to the brim. And, while some of those things may be true, there are aspects of this life that are down right unenvious, but those things don’t usually make the Instagram feed.
So- in an effort to “keep things real”, tonight I’m going to pull back the curtains and let you peek inside the life of a jet setting family. Prepare yourself…this won’t be pretty. And I hope you can have a good belly laugh, even if it is at our expense.
When you see this photo you may think, “Oh look, there they go again on an exciting new adventure!”
But when you spend as much time as we do on airplanes, you learn all kinds of new information. Like, why they put those little paper bags in the back of every chair.
**Side Note: Thankfully the flight attendants on this side of the world are pretty laid back. So when your kid is throwing up on the plane and people are bolting away from you faster than the plane is flying they will have mercy on you and let your baby sprawl out on the floor for the duration of the flight.
For this jet setting fam- we take matters into our own hands and gaze intently out the window in an effort to avoid the realization that everyone on the plane is staring at us. Hold your head high my jet setting friends, we got this.
And please don’t get me started on traveling with a baby/toddler. Keeping a baby from having a major meltdown on a two hour flight is noteworthy. However, when you are dealing with 16 and 17 hour flights and 12 hour airport layovers the goal is simply to make it to your destination
without screaming at anyone alive.
**Side Note: Fist bump to my mama friends that bring fun little activities, pack countless organic snacks and diligently wipe every surface of the airplane with Clorox wipes upon entering. I applaud you. However, when it takes this much luggage to get from point A to point B, there is no room for fluff.
Last, but not least– It’s likely that at some point your diaper wearing baby will have an absolute blow out. I’m talking poo crawling up thee back, pouring out the sides and setting off a lingering stink bomb on the back 20 rows of the plane. When this happens, you must completely ignore the fact that your own outfit is covered in poo and proceed to drag your baby to the 3 x 3 cell they call a “lavatory”.
While you are attempting to wash him in a sink the size of a volleyball it’s inevitable that he will squirm around and kick his feet until he calls for the flight attendant.
(of course, I took the time to snap a few shots with my iPhone. Cant let these things just be a memory.)
I wish I was kidding but if you notice the illuminated sign in the lower left portion of the photograph, you will see that I’m not. There’s nothing as humiliating as washing poo from your naked baby’s bum while the flight attendant beats on the door repeatedly asking, “Are you ok? Are you ok?”
As much as I wanted to scream, “NO! It’s not okay!! I have poo on my clothes and a naked baby in the sink.” I managed to squeak out a, “Yes Ma’am, everything is under control. Thank you.”
At this point you want to make sure that you have packed an extra outfit. The soiled outfit the child came on the plane wearing might as well be flushed down the toilet. A mere attempt to step out of the lavatory with that mess and you will get some “feedback” from your fellow passengers. So, reach down in your diaper bag and pull out the other… WHAT?!?!? NO OUTFIT?!?
In case you didn’t bring an extra outfit (like yours truly) you will probably sink your head in defeat and embrace the reality that the really bad day just took a harsh turn for the worse and your baby will be making the rest of the trip in a diaper. #peopleinwalmart
So the next time you see us snorkeling in the turquoise waters of the Red Sea and wish you could join us on that exotic vacation….just remind yourself that you probably don’t even want to know the rest of the story.